Impact of RC Bhaktapur for Advocating on Dignified Menopause
A lady who steered the Mercedes Car and often picked up and dropped off me whenever I was attaining RC Bhaktapur’s meeting. She always worried about me, my time, my speech, and taking care of my food, drink, safety while I was there, RC Bhaktpur’s program.
I was not an exceptional. I was caring
her as well. Since day one, I was observing her and of course her activities. The
program was in evening and at fancy hotel in Bhaktapur. There was huge crowd
and seats were hardly available together and we were bit behind of time due to
her office time. She was seated just a two seats before me. Since I got on her
car, seated at front seat along with her therefore I was holding her hand bag. She
turned towards me and asked her hand bag by gesture. I noticed bubbles of
sweats on her forehead. She wiped with her handkerchief. She started to fan by
this handkerchief too. The program was so exciting. The awards kept announced
along with signing, laughing and applauding. In less than minute later, she
went out. Sounded she felt hot though the air con was turned on and many of us
experienced cold. Her face looked tired, bit frustrated and feeling of ashamed
too.
While we were on the way to the
program, we met first time so talked about our life, education, age etc. as a
part of introduction and a business to use the time. It was about 40 minute’s
journey indeed. Thus, I aware about her age which is possible age for symptoms
of menopause.
Menopause is huge taboo topic as well.
Even in the close or stereotyped society, father worried about future of his
daughter and keep enquired about her menstruation with his wife. Because for a
masculine father, his daughter should have marriage and reproduce the children.
Having marriage and children is kinds of things done so far. Therefore, no one
like to talk about it. It’s considered as very private and women’s issue as
like menstrual bleeding.
I dared to ask about menopause while
we were on the way to back home. She responded in very positive manner. She
also shared that her other colleagues also have suffering at workplace but they
do not like to disclose. So I proposed to organize at least two hours
discussion on dignified menopause
at workplace. `It would not be easy at all because women have to compete with
men. If anyone knows about it, they started to treat as like unqualified’, she
replied. I felt her level of frustration and invisible conflict within herself
and with system. It was not necessary to experience same by all women who have
gone through menopause; natural, surgical or chemical. Even a woman’s suffering
is suffering and she deserve dignity at home, workplace and everywhere, I keep
insisted her to organize an interaction program.
Eventually, she organized an
interaction program on dignified menopause. It was fantastic indeed. Unfortunately,
I could not make convince to engage men. I was invited to office to have
introduction and asked my bio and other details.
It was Friday, two weeks before the
Teej (called red color festival) where many of were busy for shopping. All
together about 90 women were there from various positions who are working in
various branch offices of her office in Kathmandu Valley. Most importantly,
they were above 40 years old. It was started following with good snacks at her
office’s auditorium hall. These women were so beautiful, smarts, and I observed
their confidence through their gestures. During the informal meetings, mostly,
they belong with elite’ family from Kathmandu but they were living with pain
and struggling a lot at home and workplace due to peri-menopause and menopause.
They have so many stories about menarche, monthly menstruation and menopause. Despite
having their differences, they were bonded quickly because of common cause. My
heart melted.
The loss of main file (fake item) was
the most touching story from that day. A woman was assigned to take care of it
with special training, responsibility and benefit too. She was doing her job well
for few years. One day, she could not figure out where was the file? The entire
office’s operation would affect therefore, the authority took a special act for
finding the file and got it. There were so many guesses towards her act. She experienced
empty brain without any reason. She failed to explain what was happen to her. Unfortunately,
she was fired within hours. Eventually, these women confirmed that that woman
must suffered brain fog. Sadly, neither she explained not administration
understood.
In between the discussion, while we
lively discussed about the ways to make menopause dignified (dignified
menopause), these women vividly recalled the lady who lost the job without
asking a single justification and seemed serious crime to speak about it publicly
because it was their fault or intentional act.
Few percentage menstruators from all
diversities, may experience moderate to severe forms of symptoms during the
early 40’s or peri or menopause. This is not their choice or it is biological
therefore, such symptoms should take care by the government, employer as a part
of human right. The symptoms may apply throughout the body or systems and few
may even feel suicidal. Depending on the biological, socio-cultural diversities,
and topography, the individual difference always there while talking dignified
menopause however, needs to considered as a other side of coin of dignified
menstruation. To make menopause, dignified or free from all forms of menopausal
taboos, stigma, shyness, abuses, deprivation from resources and services, there
is significant role of individual (menstruator), partner or husband or children
or co-workers and state.
I believed that she inspired from this
interaction program because she agreed to participate as a speaker in our
webinar on the occasion of international Menopausal day, October 18 along with
myself and Dr Reeta Agrawal, India.
This kinds of advocacy around
dignified menopause would not possible if Ms.Binita Hada, Chair of RC Bhaktapur
(Rotary Club of Bhaktapur) would not partnered with Radha Paudel Foundation (RPF) for
advocating around dignified
menstruation (DM) in July 2021. The collaboration was not only limit with RC
Bhaktpur but also extend with its members. I involved with few life time events
through the collaborations with members of RC Bhaktapur e.g. Ms. Bhawani Thapa
Ghimire as explained above.
RC Bhaktapur is really committed to
stand for promoting dignified
menstruation (DM) therefore it has organized series of activities like
training to rotracts, women wheel, marking 4th international DM day
along with RI Jennifer Jones in Nepal, media mobilization, etc. in Nepal and
beyond.
I am looking forward to seeing rest of
members from RC Bhaktapur in future towards dignified menstruation. The
programs around girls programs, women empowerment were/are/will not enough to advocate
the urgency of dignified menstruation at home, school, community and
everywhere. Hope RC Bhaktpur will not do mistake by missing the most important
theme of DM. The continuity of the DM as well as bringing long term impact for
just and gender equal society should be the HOPE of rotary regardless of clubs
or country. Therefore, I appealed to RC Bhaktapur to continue the advocacy on
DM in coming days without any compromises or conditions.
This is for Rotary Club of Bhaktapur's Annual Book
